Me: What are you doing, Charlotte? And
with a stripper?!
This
whole thing seems so unreal. First my best friend becomes a runaway bride, then
we find out she has a STD and now she's in a limo with a blonde stripper! A guy
who we didn't think she liked.
Weeks
ago, we decided to give her an early bachelorette party, and we also decided to
follow tradition and get her a stripper. He dressed up as a cop and danced all
over Charlotte. She was so disgusted,
she even pushed him away. She said that she'll never want him on top of her
again. I guessed today she changed her mind.
Dan: How could you do something like
this?
Charlotte: You don't understand! It's
not what it looks like!
Me: Thank get out of the DAMN car and
tells us what it looks like!
She
put back on her wedding dress and stepped out of the limo. The dress was wrinkled
up and I don't want to know what those stains were. Her mascara was running,
lipstick smeared and she reeked of shame.
Charlotte: I'm so sorry that you have
to see me like this. I'm so...sorry!
That's
when she started to cry. And that's when
I realized that she was still my best friend.
I asked Dan for a handkerchief and wiped her tears. She leaned against
the limo and told us her secrets.
Charlotte: I'm such a terrible person.
I wasted your time, money and the worst part is...I've been lying to everyone.
Dan: What do you mean?
Charlotte: I love Josh and I always
wanted to get married but I've been having a hard time dealing with the fact
that I'm gonna be someone's wife.
Me: That's why you ran off with this guy?
She
nodded.
Dan: I bet you getting Chlamydia from Josh
made you more scared, huh?
Charlotte: Actually...I'm the one who
gave it to him.
I
never thought Dan and I's jaws could drop so low. I mean, Charlotte was voted
most responsible and clean in high school. I so wont to change my vote.
Me: From who?
She
pointed to the stripper.
Charlotte: After my party, I found out he
forgot one of his handcuffs, so I wanted to return it before he left. I stopped
him and that's when we went at it in his car. I just wanted to make a mistake.
Then, I kept making this mistake for weeks. During that time, I've noticed that
I been losing money from my purse. Now I realize it might be this guy who've
been taking my money. I've been blaming Josh for everything to hide my shame,
including the STD.
The
blonde peeked his out of the limo's window.
Blonde: You have a STD?
Me: Shut up, a-hole!
Charlotte: I either got it from him or
the priest's son.
Dan: You know you have to tell Josh
everything, right?
Charlotte: I know...I know.
When
we stepped into the church, everyone was horrified to see their precious bride turn
into what a dark alley threw up. Ashley almost fainted when she saw what became
of her designer gown. We reunited Charlotte with Josh and she bared her soul. I
can tell you that he was NOT happy. He screamed at her, called her things that
I will never repeat and promised her that he'll take his new secretary on their
honeymoon. Charlotte was devastated, but what do you expect?
Since
the guests didn't get to see a beautiful wedding, they demanded a reception.
That or they were going to sue. Dan and I ate at our assigned table alone.
Me: I thought I knew everything about Charlotte,
but I guessed I didn't.
Dan: You learn new things about people every
day.
Me: Like she has a thing for exotic
dancers in cop uniforms?
Dan: And that Ashley's dress is a great
hiding place for a bride or you know, groomsman.
I
laughed. He took my hand over the table and kissed it.
Me: Thank you for being here for me, I
couldn't do this without you.
Dan: My pleasure.
He
kissed my lips and reminded me why I was so crazy for him.
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